Building a relationship

  1. Cross-cultural understanding

    Eye contact

    In many Western societies, including the United States, a person who does not maintain good eye contact is regarded as being slightly suspicious, or a 'shifty' character. Americans unconsciously associate people who avoid eye contact as unfriendly, insecure, untrustworthy, inattentive and impersonal. However, in contrast, Japanese children are taught in school to direct their gaze at the region of their teacher's Adam's apple or tie knot and, as adults, Japanese lower their eyes when speaking to a superior, a gesture of respect.

     

    Latin American cultures, as well as some African cultures, such as Nigeria, have longer looking time, but prolonged eye contact from an individual of lower statues is considered disrespectful. In the US, it is considered rude to stare – regardless of who is looking at whom. In contrast, the polite Englishman is taught to pay strict attention to a speaker, to listen carefully, and to blink his eyes to let the speaker know he or she has been understood as well as heard. Americans signal interest and comprehension by bobbing their heads or grunting.

     

    A widening of the eyes can also be interpreted differently, depending on circumstances and culture. Take, for instance, the case of an American and a Chinese discussing the terms of a proposed contract. Regardless of the language in which the proposed contract is carried out, the US negotiator may interpret a Chinese person's widened eyes as an expression of astonishment instead of as a danger signal (its true meaning) of politely expressed anger.

     

    Vocabulary:

    Eye contact: a situation in which two people look at each other's eyes.

    Suspicious: 1.believing that someone has probably done something wrong 2.feeling that someone or something cannot be trusted

    Shifty: looking dishonest

    Unconsciously: 1. not seeing, feeling, or thinking. 2. when you do not realize something.

    Inattentive: not giving much attention to someone or something

    Impersonal: 1. not showing friendly feelings or interest. 2. not considering people's individual needs and situations. 3. seeming friendly because lacking personal features.

    Adam's
    apple: lump at front of man's throat.

    Superior: better, bigger, of high quality, behaving in proud way, of high status, [only before noun] higher.

    Prolong: to make something last longer

    Blink: quickly close and open eyes.

    Astonishment: very great surprise

     

     

  2. Welcome Visitors

    Practice: Make a dialog based on the low chart

     

    Visitor

    Introduce yourself.

    Say you have an appointment with Sandra Bates.

     

     

    Decline – ask if you can use a phone.

    Decline – you only need the phone.

    Thank him/her.

    (a few minutes later)

    Thank assistant.

     

    Ask how far it is to station.

     

    Accept offer – suggest a time.

    Receptionist

     

     

     

    Welcome visitor.

    Explain that SB will be along shortly.

    Offer a drink / refreshments.

     

    Say yes / Offer fax as well.

     

    Show visitor to the phone.

     

     

     

     

    Reply – offer any other help.

     

    Two miles – ten minutes by taxi.

    Offer to book one.

     

    Promise to do that – say that SB is free now.

    Offer to take him/her to SB's office.

     

 

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